Just say no to hormone pie

It is so difficult to tell how old people are these days. I met a guy the other day who was 43 but he didn’t look a day older than foetus. I also saw a woman on TV a few weeks back who was 11 years old, but she was a woman. Not only that, she was a soccer mom. I used to be able to look at someone and pretty much guess their age. A guess that would be accurate to within a year or so anyway. But these days you can’t tell. I heard about a crack baby that was pregnant with its own mother. I know, that doesn’t make any sense at all, but the fact that someone would believe it, even for a split second, proves my point. As one final example consider Lindsay Lohan. With her it is pretty clear that her premature over-aging is due to drugs and hard living. But there are still some people in this world who don’t do drugs. I think the bigger issue is all the hormones in everything. There are hormones in pie, steak, eggs... Just about everything is chock-full of hormones. I don’t really have anything else to say on this subject. But my pumpkin pie was just baked fresh yesterday and it seems to be pregnant. There haven’t been any other pies anywhere near it. Asexual reproduction of baked goods has to be caused by hormones right?